The Political Circus

PODCAST: Political Dad

EPISODE: 28

Title: The Political Circus

[Opening Theme Music]

Hey folks, Political Dad here on the Common Sense Broadcast Network. Washington just dodged a government shutdown, but guess what? The national debt's still climbing to $33 trillion. Are you tired of this yet? Don't go anywhere; we're breaking it down!

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I gotta tell you, we've got a roller coaster on Capitol Hill that's crazier than anything you'll find at Disney World! The Government Shutdown has been "averted," but hold your applause. Why? Because Washington's favorite sport isn't baseball; it's "Kick the Can Down the Road!"

That's right, we're $33 trillion in debt—let me repeat, $33 TRILLION!—and our politicians act like they're doing us a favor by not shutting the government down. Are you kidding me? That's like a lifeguard saying, "Hey, I didn't let you drown today, give me a medal!" They give themselves a pat on the back, meanwhile, our national debt is piling up like dirty laundry!

Folks, it's all smoke and mirrors. They're telling us, "We saved you from a government shutdown!" But let's break it down like a Lego set: What are they really saving us from? They're the ones creating this mess in the first place! It's like setting your own house on fire and then bragging about how fast you called 911!

And here's another thing, while they're "saving us," guess who's getting rich? You think they're doing this for free? Haha, good one! They're filling their pockets faster than a kid fills a Halloween bag. But instead of candy, it's your hard-earned money they're grabbing.

Matt Gaetz, Kevin McCarthy—they're wrestling it out like it's WrestleMania, and it’s entertaining, sure. But don't get distracted. Remember the main event: our national debt, the ticking time bomb that nobody in Washington wants to defuse.

So, the question I got for you is: when will the American people get tired of this show? When will we say enough is enough? Because folks, at some point, the can they're kicking down the road is gonna explode, and guess who's going to be left cleaning up the mess? That's right, you and me—the American taxpayer.

Alright, folks, let's dive into the latest drama coming out of the Swamp—Rep. Matt Gaetz wants to give House Speaker Kevin McCarthy the boot! Gaetz says McCarthy's playing nice with Democrats to keep the government's lights on, and for Gaetz, that's a no-go. The Florida man is planning to file a "motion to vacate" against McCarthy. Now, you may be asking, does he have a shot? Well, the guy's got a tough hill to climb. He's gonna need Dems to join him, and let me tell you, that's like asking cats and dogs to play nice! Even AOC, the darling of the left, says she'd consider ousting McCarthy—but for a price. And let's not forget, there's infighting in the GOP, too. Some say Gaetz is all hat and no cattle, just looking for his next TV gig. So, the question is, is Gaetz on a kamikaze mission, or is he shaking the tree to see what falls?

Alright, hang tight, we've got a lot more to dissect. Don't go away; this is Political Dad, keeping it real on the Common Sense Broadcast Network!

Gotobreak

And we're back, ladies and gentlemen! Buckle up, because we're taking a detour from the D.C. Swamp to a much colder one—Russia! Now, listen up: Vladimir Putin's sidekick, Dmitry Medvedev, is out here throwing verbal grenades. He says if the UK puts boots on the ground in Ukraine, well, it's gonna be "Katie, bar the door," because Russia's gonna "ruthlessly destroy" 'em. Medvedev's mouth is running faster than a high-speed blender, claiming NATO countries are being run by "idiots" pushing us toward World War 3!

So what's the play here? Is this just Russia trying to flex, or is there some real fire behind that smoke? Folks, it's a game of chicken with nuclear stakes. But here's where it gets messy: NATO members, including the UK, are tippy-toeing around the issue. They want to help Ukraine but not get caught in Russia's crosshairs. It's like walking a tightrope over a pit of alligators. Either way, someone's gonna take a bite.

Now let's cut through the smoke, shall we? You ever wonder if all this saber-rattling is just another magician's trick? One hand's making noise over here, while the other hand's in the cookie jar—our cookie jar! These DC bigwigs have been cashing checks from foreign governments for years. It's like a carousel of cash and they've all got VIP tickets.

So, why are we talking about war and threats? Because it's a classic distraction! These politicians strut into Washington, D.C. with empty pockets, and lo and behold, they walk out filthy rich. Now, I don't know about you, but last time I checked, public service salaries weren't making anyone a millionaire. So how's it happening? I'll tell you how—bribe-a-nomics, my friends.

And the cherry on top? Most of these guys will sit in office until they're knocking on heaven's door, and guess who gets all the spoils? Their families, that's who! They get the golden tickets while we get the crumbs. Folks, it's not a government "by the people, for the people" anymore; it's "by the politicians, for the politicians."

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Now, you've got a lot of noise out there about how Putin's got his finger hovering over the red button, ready to rain nukes. But let's be real here—Putin knows better. He knows that if he pulls that trigger, it's game over for him and his country, too, because we'd send them right back. It's like a game of chicken that no one wins, folks!

But here's what keeps me up at night. What if someone sneaks one of those bad boys across the border? And that's why we gotta talk about our southern border. Listen, we've got laws for a reason—so we can keep track of who's coming and going. It's not about being heartless; it's about keeping this country safe. You lock your front door at night, right? Well, consider the border our national front door, and folks, it's wide open!

This isn't a Democrat or Republican issue; it's an American issue. We've already got the laws; let's enforce them! Stop the flow of drugs, stop the criminals, and hey, maybe stop a potential weapon of mass destruction from getting through. Stop making it a political football, and let's get back to common-sense security.

Alright, folks, Political Dad here, asking you the question nobody else will. You ever think our politicians in DC are green with envy when they look at guys like Putin? I mean, think about it. Putin's got palaces, endless luxury, and he doesn't have to answer to anybody! You've got world leaders pocketing their citizens' hard-earned cash, living like kings while their people struggle. It's the ultimate power trip!

Now, I gotta ask: Is that what our politicians aspire to? I mean, they go to Washington as average Joes and come out millionaires! It's like they hit the jackpot, and you and I are funding their luxury lifestyles. Makes you wonder if they're not just trying to take a page out of the Putin playbook, doesn't it? Stay tuned; we've got more truth bombs coming your way.

Spot

Alright folks, let's take a minute to discuss Dianne Feinstein, the esteemed Senator from California who just recently passed away. Now, she was no spring chicken in the political game—Feinstein was the longest-serving female member in the history of the Senate. She got her start in San Fran, on the Board of Supervisors, and she even stepped into the Mayor's seat in '78 after a grim assassination shook the city.

But hold on a minute—let's not forget that she was an integral part of the DC Elite. Yeah, you heard me. She was so ingrained in the Washington system, she practically had her own parking spot. Three decades in the Senate doesn't happen by accident; you've gotta be wheeling, dealing, and essentially becoming a part of the machine. And she had her issues, too—gun control being one of her big talking points.

Feinstein was born and raised in San Francisco, went to an all-girls high school, and was even into ballet and sports. After that, she attended Stanford University, graduating with a degree in history. So she wasn't exactly a slouch, but she was educated in the ways of the elite from a young age. Now, she's had her health struggles recently—everything from shingles to Ramsay Hunt Syndrome. Some people were even calling for her to step down, but she decided to tough it out.

So as we reflect on her life and political journey, let's remember she played a role in a system that often seems more interested in helping the elite than the average American. She may be gone, but the system is still humming along, folks. Stay tuned, we've got more truths to uncover.

Paper crinkle

Well, well, well, folks, if this doesn't make you scratch your head, I don't know what will. Meghan Markle, the Duchess of Sussex, is considering throwing her royal hat into the very American ring of politics. That's right, she might be taking a shot at the Senate seat left vacant by the late Dianne Feinstein. Now, this is Hollywood-level drama coming to politics, ladies and gentlemen.

Meghan's been hobnobbing with the elites of the Democratic Party, and some folks think she's even got her eyes set on the White House someday. Yeah, the British royal family member wants to become an American President. Somebody, cue the fireworks and bald eagles.

So here's the deal: California Governor Gavin Newsom has to pick someone to fill Feinstein's shoes until the next election. And Newsom has promised to appoint a black woman to the role. You know how politics work—there's always a catch. Most of the qualified black women have already thrown their names into the 2024 race for Feinstein's seat. If Newsom picks any of them now, he'd be accused of favoritism. So, in walks Meghan Markle, at least in the rumor mill.

Meghan has been cultivating some political friendships, rubbing elbows with folks like feminist icon Gloria Steinem. But let's keep it real—this is the same woman who's been spending time with Oprah and the Kennedys. Now, some Democrats are even saying, "Hold up, this is a bit much." But in today's crazy world of politics, can you rule anything out?

So whether you find the idea of Meghan in the Senate as a fairy tale or a nightmare, one thing's for sure: politics keeps getting more and more interesting. And let's be honest, if someone who was once in line to be British royalty ends up in the U.S. Senate, it'd be the biggest crossover event since the Avengers movies. Keep your eyes peeled, because we're all in for a rollercoaster ride.

Show Close

All right, my friends, gather around the golden EIB microphone because we've got ourselves a real showstopper here. Political Dad, coming at ya with some hot takes on this spicy story.   Wait, Wait, Wait.  It’s the CSB Microphone and its not Gold.  Slip of the tongue folks.

So, what do we have here? Donald Trump, the 45th President of the United States, finds himself squaring off in a New York courtroom. And not just against any plaintiff, mind you, but also a judge who's already called him a fraud. Talk about getting a head start! You think this judge, Arthur Engoron, is giving Trump a fair shake? Nah, folks, this is like playing a baseball game where the umpire is wearing the other team’s jersey!

Trump's being accused of all sorts of financial shenanigans. The judge has already revoked some licenses for Trump's big-name properties. This is serious stuff, and the attorney general is gunning for $250 million. Pocket change, right? Not!

But let's back up here. This judge, who Trump aptly calls "deranged," is going to decide the whole kit and kaboodle himself. No jury. Just one guy who’s already shown he's got a bone to pick with the former president. So tell me, how's that for justice?

And folks, the hits just keep on coming for Trump. After this trial, he’s got a laundry list of legal battles waiting for him. Defamation suits, federal criminal trials—you name it, they’re throwing it at him. It's like the legal world's version of a buffet, and they're piling on the lawsuits like it's all-you-can-eat ribs night.

So, should Trump be worried? Well, let's remember that the man's a fighter. Even if he's walking into a courtroom that might as well have a "No Trumps Allowed" sign on the door, you better believe he's not going down without a slugfest.

Bottom line? Folks, the political circus is in town, and it looks like the main act is just getting started. In a world where cancel culture is becoming law and the elites want to shut down anyone who doesn't sing their tune, this trial is going to be one to watch. Buckle up, because it's gonna be a bumpy ride.

Alright, my friends, time for some Dad jokes to wrap up today's whirlwind of a podcast!

You know, they say our national debt is like a ticking time bomb. Well, let me tell you, the only thing these politicians are defusing is our faith in the system!

Rep. Matt Gaetz wants to boot Kevin McCarthy? Well, if Washington were a shoe store, Gaetz would be trying to return the shoes without a receipt!

Oh, AOC's considering ousting McCarthy for a price? What's she gonna do, sell the motion on eBay?

Putin's hovering over the red button? Yeah, and I'm hovering over the "unsubscribe" button every time I see a politician's tweet.

Ah, our southern border—where the only thing tighter than border security is the politicians' grip on our wallets!

Meghan Markle wants a Senate seat? Well, that's one way to make the Senate even more of a "royal pain"!

And let's wrap it up with this gem: If Meghan Markle does end up in the U.S. Senate, I guess she'd be the only Senator with real experience dealing with "crown affairs"!

Alright, folks, that's it for today's episode of Political Dad on the Common Sense Broadcast Network! We're out of time, but we're never out of opinions. Keep it real, keep it tuned, and as always, let's bring some common sense back to this crazy world. Signing off!